I feel like a shitty mom AND a shitty student. I can't get him to go to sleep these days - I'm not patient enough. I'm so sleepy and so hungry and so anxious about school and I can't calm down enough to get him to groove off of me. All I have to offer is the boob, and if that doesn't knock him out I don't know what to do.
Thank god Robert can get him to sleep, but that makes me feel even shittier. Moms are supposed to be able to do that too, for chrissakes.
At least once we get him to sleep he's still sleeping at night (and I probably just jinxed that too.) But he only got up once between 6:30 pm and 4:30 am last night. Of course, I had to get up at 5:00 to plan my class, and I stayed up till almost midnight studying, so it didn't do me much good - but at least I know he's still getting the sleep he needs at night.
And I didn't finish the reading for yesterday OR today, and I felt so stupid in class, I barely understood anything that I HAD read, and everybody else is smarter than me now - and I feel like my head is stuffed with pudding (and that's another thing, I'm supposed to make some goddamn pudding tonight for my father in law's birthday) and I have a presentation to do next week AND a paper to turn in and I can barely get the daily work done.
And also, I'm starving. Fuck.